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We are taught from a young age in the United States that we need to be on high alert, because pregnancy can happen anytime, anywhere, under any circumstance. The myths that spread through gossip in middle and high school (jacuzzi, anyone?), the lack of comprehensive sex education taught to our youth, and the heteronormativity of information out there all contribute to a deep lack of knowledge about the many ways that babymaking happens. We need more nuanced information about fertility and conception!
My goals with this blog post are to demystify the babymaking space and to queer up the information to make it more accessible for all.
A bit about me before I begin: My name is Leila, and I’m a full spectrum doula in Chicago (check out my website here!). That means my knowledge encompasses the entire field of babymaking, from pre-conception through the postpartum period. I’m trained in birth and postpartum through Bebo Mia and Childbirth Education through Cornerstone Birthworker Training, and I’m certified in fertility awareness education through FEMM. I’m also a former middle school teacher, current knitter, cooker and worker-outer, and I love all things Chicago!
I’d also like to talk about language before I get into any nitty gritty. In the world of fertility, many people use the words “female” and “male” reproductive systems. I choose to use internal reproductive system when talking about people with uteruses, cervixes, etc, and external reproductive system when talking about people with testicles, penises, etc. This is because I know that our reproductive systems are not connected to gender in any way. When working with clients, I always ask what language they’d like me to use when talking about their bodies, because everyone deserves the autonomy to make decisions for how their bodies are described. Because I can’t ask you, dear reader, I’m going to use anatomical terms as I go through this post.
So, let’s get into trying to conceive, also known in the fertility world as TTC. Let’s start with some basics: There are a few things necessary to make a baby. First off, you need sperm and an egg. That sperm and egg can come from anywhere - inside someone’s body, from known or anonymous donors, or from a previously frozen sample. The next thing you need is a uterus, a place for the combined sperm and egg to get cozy.
I’d like to spend some time on the uterus, because this is where a lot of myths come about. Also because I LOVE it. The uterus is magical. It works in cycles, and is a powerful space within someone’s body. It can sync with other people who have uteruses, and it’s deeply influenced by both inside and outside factors that humans come into contact with (stress, joy, the moon, to name a few). The uterus, the cervix, the ovaries and fallopian tubes all work together in order to decide if a baby is ready to enter the chat. Understanding HOW this happens is the key to a knowledgeable TTC journey. So, let’s talk about this cycle:
First, FSH (follicle stimulating hormone) is triggered by a drop in both estrogen and progesterone from the previous cycle. FSH comes from the brain and signals to the ovary to start recruiting follicles for growth.
Within the ovary, one follicle, with an egg inside it, begins to grow. As it grows, it produces more and more estrogen.
When that estrogen level is high enough, it triggers the brain to produce LH (luteinizing hormone).
LH communicates back with the follicle to rupture, releasing the egg into the fallopian tube.
The ruptured follicle turns into the corpus luteum and begins to produce progesterone. The egg travels in the fallopian tube, waiting for a potential sperm to fertilize it.
If a sperm meets with the egg and they merge, they travel together in the form of a zygote towards the uterus. It takes 6-7 days to travel and then implant in the lining of a uterus.
Once implanted, the corpus luteum will continue to produce progesterone to keep that uterus nice and plump as the fetus begins to grow. The corpus luteum will produce progesterone for the first 10ish weeks of the pregnancy, and then the placenta will take over.
If a sperm doesn’t meet up with that egg, the egg disintegrates after 12-24 hours.
Because fertilization hasn’t happened, the corpus luteum dissolves, stops producing progesterone, and levels of estrogen and progesterone drop. This drop triggers a shedding of the uterine lining, known as menstruation. This is the beginning of the cycle all over again.
This cycle can be tracked through the observation of certain biomarkers. By observing cervical mucus, LH levels, menstruation, (and secondarily - temperature and cervical position), people with internal reproductive systems can understand their ovulation cycle and therefore understand when they are best able to conceive!
But what’s even cooler about the internal reproductive system - it’s also a vital sign of health! Once a person get to know their unique patterns, they’ll be able to use their cycle to see how they are overall. This is because estrogen and progesterone are tied to so much more in their body besides being able to conceive! Take a look at the chart below:
Estrogen | Progesterone | |
Uterus | Tones and Contracts | Relaxes |
Endometrium (uterine lining) | Grows | Maintains |
Breast/chest Tissue | Grows | Normalizes |
Bones | Formation | Maintenance |
Blood Vessels | Dilates and Increases Flow | Relaxes |
Blood Clotting | Increases | Normalizes |
Blood Sugar | Elevates | Normalizes |
Sodium | Fluid Retention | Natural Diuretic |
Brain Cells | Stimulates | Maintains and Heals |
Overall Well-Being | Normal levels promote well-being, high levels increase anxiety | Promotes sleep and relaxation, decreases anxiety |
**Information comes from FEMM research and educational materials. I am a certified FEMM educator. Find more information about FEMM here.
As you can see, hormones play HUGE roles in overall health. Being able to track hormone levels can help someone spot issues, hopefully before they turn into bigger concerns. It can also help people feel more in control of their bodies, more in tune with their natural selves, and empower them to advocate for themselves within the medical system. It can also help people who are trying to conceive understand their bodies better, no matter how they decide for sperm to meet the egg.
Are you someone who wants to start a TTC journey? Are you mid-journey and need a thought partner? Are you someone who wants to learn more about cycle tracking? Are you a human who wants to connect to another human? You can find me at my website, or on IG at NightlightBirthandBody!
Resources for more info:
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